tie dye

we've tried tie dye-ing before in the past but honestly it was a complete trainwreck. it involved making crappy end products (which i still wear mind you- and actually, lulu is wearing one today, too) but the colors faded over time. and it involved using lots of scalding pots on our grill, and destroying all our kitchen utensils and pans.

i've had my eye on this good tie dye kit for a while, and jumped on the chance when it was on sale--

we used this exact kit, which i would highly recommend. especially if you buy if for 50% off, or use a 40% off coupon.

the kits uses the good dyes, and soda ash to fix the colors. i also learned that using 100% cotton is key and makes a huge difference. i don't even know what kind of junk we used in the past but it made this kit look completely rock star. johnny, being johnny, researched and WATCHED THE DVD THAT CAME WITH THE KIT MULTIPLE TIMES before we could start the adventure as a family. but let me tell you, the research paid off and they all came out amazing! and nobody burnt any of their skin off! and the kids can tell you the names and differences between all the different patterns! and now we can all go out in public completely matching in tie dye and make complete strangers uncomfortable! it's perfect.

(of course, being in your underwear while doing tie dye, like joey is demonstrating, is completely key to the process as well)

you should totally try it.

weekend recap

the opening was totally freaking incredible, one of the best days. i felt supported, lifted up, and seen in so many ways. my favorite thing that was said all day was when my dad said "when the hell do you do all this stuff?!?" my reply was "it's my secret life!". and in a sense, it was...my secret life, on display for all to see.

the turnout was pretty amazing, considering i was expecting to sit there by my lonesome (or at least with the friend i made promise to come and sit with me!) almost 40 people came to the little coffee shop and inundated the staff with orders. and I ACTUALLY SOLD PIECES. what what? at the last minute, my friend encouraged me (read: lovingly forced) to put up prices. i did it for the learning experience but never expected to sell any of my paintings or photographs. and i sold 10 things (one of which was a series of 7 paintings)- which was almost half of what i had hung! and complete strangers bought my work! which was trippy and sweet. so that was the icing on the cake.

but what really got me all fuzzy was the warmth and energy that flew around all day- friends from near and far, a beautiful necklace made for me from a dear friend, friends with babies, friends showing their love, husbands of friends and friends of friends. life is beautiful, and i'm lucky to be living this one.

so i thank you- for the emails, for the cyber-support, for the messages and texts. for helping me actualize something scary, and for making it fun, and quite not-scary.

pooping sequins

i don't even know what made me think of this random goal- but one of my goals for 2010 was "have my paintings hang in a coffee shop". little did i know, all it would take was me carrying my tiny paintings in a peace sign covered basket to a local coffee shop, walking up to the counter and talking to the sweet owner. i said "so, want to look at my work and see if you like it enough?" and he took a peek and said "i like your stuff! want to be our featured artist for may?" (which ended up being pushed back to june due to some crazy weather issues...). so there it was- a goal realized. and it felt kind of good. and kind of scary.

without the help and constant (and i mean constant) encouragement of my dear friend C, i would not have pulled this off. she encouraged me to paint more, she watched my kids for me and walked screaming lulu out of the coffee shop after she threw a glass of water on the floor while i was setting up the show. she checked in on me and told me she was proud. and she's my fabulous PR girl and gives me credit when i discredit myself. so i give major props to her!

and props to johnny, for driving the kids around the block 50 times while i wired the backs of every painting that he carted into the space for me, all during the crazy lunch rush. try hanging paintings during a lunch rush! it's insanity.

this was a total learning process for me- and let me tell you, i had no idea what i was (or am) doing. all i know is that i made some things (i have about 20 paintings and photographs up) and hung them. they look nice. to me. and that's all that matters, right? it's kind of cool to see my paintings in a public space. my little painting hanging over the head of the person with the mayonnaise smeared on their mouth! it's a little trippy. i have learned that sometimes you have to work with what you have- i originally brought WAY too many pieces, and had to edit which ones to use when i found out that i had to use the nails that were already in the wall (it's a very old brick wall...with not so many nails). and so i couldn't hang them the way that i wanted to. and every time someone came into the coffee shop when i was hanging the pieces and opened or closed the door, they would fall off the wall. and for some reason i thought it would be a cool idea to bring ALL THREE OF MY WILD CHILDREN TO HANG MY FIRST SHOW. that wasn't the best idea. so i'll store that in my file for the future. like i said, it's a learning process.

i'm not fooling myself- this is small beans. but it's a start, and it's a symbol of something bigger for me. setting a goal that seems silly, or unachievable, and then just doing it. even though it feels uncomfortable. or like i'm faking it. but really, we're all faking it until we make it, right?

so tomorrow is my modest little opening. and i'm pooping sequins over it.

(back story- lulu took a poop on the deck this weekend while playing in the kiddie pool. we noticed that it seemed sparkly- and upon closer inspection we realized that IT HAD SEQUINS IN IT! (clearly she had about 39 carrots, too). and even though this picture will certainly offend and disgust some of you- i had to include it so you could see that I DON'T MAKE THIS STUFF UP. she poops sequins. and now i have a new catch phrase. which is amazing.)

taking a moment to smell the flowers

i was waiting in line to check in at the doctor's office the other day, which is quite a factory. the line spiraled around and i was at the end of it, almost late for my appointment. i was standing by the window, taking a deep breath in and trying to put it into perspective. i was desperately trying to think about how lucky i was to only have to go to the doctor every once in a while and not all the time like people with chronic illnesses. but i was still frustrated, not wanting to miss my appointment, not wanting to be there for this "precautionary thyroid ultrasound" anyway- not wanting to find out the results.

but when i looked out the window, i saw a very elderly woman. she was slowly, slowly, slowly making her way up the handicapped ramp. her eyes were almost completely swollen shut, and her face and eyelids were covered in large growths. as she made her way up toward the door, she noticed the gorgeous flower box under the window. she stopped. she hobbled over to the flowers, admired them, bent over and took a deep breath in.

and with that, i was ok with standing in line. i was ok with waiting. and i was struck by the amazing power of the universe to send me such powerful messages of love.

living the days that lay ahead

lately i've been sitting and having some major, life changing thoughts. i've also been having some crazy dreams, every night. am i on the cusp of something big? this year feels huge for me on so many different levels- growing as a mother, as an artist, and as a friend. deepening my spiritual practices just seems like a piece of a puzzle on this journey.

i'd like to say it's been easy. all this growing and changing. but with change and growth comes accountability. and some days are not easy at all. the days when i feel like a less-than-stellar mom, when i question the validity of my work. when i worry what people think about the path i'm walking. when i question the give and take.

and then there are those other days. those days that completely shine. the days when a friend calls just to tell me that she's proud of me. the days that i feel cradled and cared for. the days when i look around me and see the most incredible individuals, sharing my life with me. the days that i feel better than i've felt in forever. the sweetest part is in the knowing that there's a lifetime of these days spread out before me, just waiting to be lived.

i can't wait to live them.

xx

period- the end.

today i'm choosing to focus on the things that fill me up and make my life whole.

there are certain things i like

there's an expression in our household, and it goes a little something like this "but there are certain things i like!". one would say this particular expression if you were asking your spouse to go get you a big bowl of ben and jerry's- or better yet, you ask them to just go get you the whole container. or if you rub your scratchy feet back and forth on their legs in bed and they ask you to stop and you say "but there are certain things i like!". or if you need to do certain things on the weekend, like get drink treats or go to bed at 6:30pm. it's all for the love of "there are certain things i like". you should try it, because it gives you permission to do and ask for all sorts of crazy things, free of guilt.

so here i present a list of certain things i like lately:

dreaming big

being together

being alone
making the little baby on my tattoo hold funny things like seashells

meditating

laying in the grass on tapestries

long tables filled with cool people

chocolate and candles and paint splatters

sharing art supplies and leading a workshop! (and evidently having bad posture and sticking my post baby tummy out!)
-sweet friends from NH
creative masterminds
funny baskets of art supplies, especially the rainbow brite lunchbox filled with scraps

roadtrips, and then coming home again


what are your certain things that you like? xx

up up and away!

headed off for the weekend for a sweet little retreat- the brainchild of kat! i'm feeling very spoiled to be leaving again..and very lucky. we will be by the sea...sharing food and sitting together, learning. i am also excited to be leading my first ART WORKSHOP! this is huge for me. which is why i woke up at 3am. i feel externally calm but i think internally i may be freaking out a bit. i'm bringing fairy lights, tapestries, and fresh flowers...clearly these are things i think are important to teach an informative workshop ;) can't wait to report back after my weekend at the sea!

xx

life is a whirlwind

holy crap- my dad got married this weekend!

and what a wonderful, beautiful day it was. i got a little teary (ok, a lot teary) and a LOT goofy during the ceremony this weekend. yes, even though i am old and mature enough to be a witness and sign an official marriage certificate, i'm never too old to make tool-ish faces for pictures. and as you can see, gray is following suit, just as i expect her to.

but back to LOVE. it's a beautiful thing, isn't it? i'm so happy for my dad and nancy, and if you've had the pleasure of seeing them together, you are probably pretty happy for them, too. love works in mysterious ways- and when it's right, it's right. deep sigh of relief- they ended up together. aaaaahhhh.

even in the rain...even though i was wearing birkenstocks (which gray informed me were 'a bit off' and 'manly') and a soggy, furry viking vest (which people took turns wearing and posing for pictures in!)- the day was just as it was meant to be. and i got a whole new family out of the deal! we have a lot of fun together, each of us allowing each other to be exactly who we are. i appreciate everyone putting up with me! i'm so happy (big dorky tears).

channeling the joy

today i'm channeling the joy captured in these small faces. the bravery, the abandon, the joy. what are you channeling today?