days like this

some days
are really crappy
and at any given moment
someone needs their bum wiped
or someone is puking up cottage-cheese like
chocolate milk
all over the rugs
someone's crying
someone's fighting
someone lost a shoe
someone stepped in dog poop
someone's whining
someone's just being a real jerk.

on days like this
i almost go there
and have a pity party
for myself

i try hard not to
but sometimes i kind of do

sometimes
like today
i put everyone in the car
and drive through the rain
and make everyone look at the foliage
and then i go buy expensive bread and cheese
and some salad
and have a mug of tea.
sure, it's not good for the environment,
this mindless driving around,
but sometimes it's what i have to do.
and then i take pictures of the kids
in mid-flight
and i feel better.


the end. xx

real talk 2010 revisited

after writing and posting this blog post about real talk 2010, people came crawling out of the woodwork, bruised and bleeding, just itching to tell their real talk tales. i could not have imagined the stories that my friends had- just waiting to be shared. it was actually pretty life changing- the opening up, the rawness, and the connections that i felt in the aftermath of that posting. i've been marinating in the real talk over the past couple of months since that post, thinking about the stories that we all have to offer, the secrets that keep us prisoner.

i think there's something to be said for having a friend offer you an outlet to share something taboo. i think there's something healing in laying out your most raw, vulnerable, and oftentimes not-pretty tidbits, and having someone tell you that it's OK. that they do not judge you. that they too, in fact, have their own undesirable shitty things. that we all have our shit.

and let me tell you- i've learned more about my friends since june than in the whole lifetime of these friendships. it's radical. and in the opening, i have learned more about myself. i've learned about balancing the "positive talk" and the "real talk". there is something healing to be had with a good dose of real talk. it allows you to go deeper, to be more authentic.



see how i'm rambling? this is the reason why i haven't wrote this "real talk 2010 revisited" blog post until today. i still can't eloquently say what i want to say about it. but here's the bottom line- NO REGRETS about 2010 being the year of the real talk. keep layin' it on me, friends, and i'll lay it all down for you, too.


xx

my butt

lately
i have had
lots of little people
up my butt
all day long
and now that one of them
has a later bedtime
there really isn't one waking second
during the day
when i don't have someone rubbing up against me

some days i wonder
if my skin
is literally chaffing off
with all the rubbing

there are usually dried streaks
and smears
from somebody's bodily fluids
across my shirt
or skirt

there are days
when i feel
like i might go crazy
and then there are other days
when i feel like the luckiest person
in the world

to be covered in love
overwhelmed with family
to be crowded with joy
to be allowed to bear witness
to the chaos.

xx

simple rules to live by

(gray and her shadow's "peach heart" while peach picking the other day)



1. if your well is empty, fill up someone else's and yours will feel magically full again.

2. if you don't want to do something, don't do it. if you want to do something but are scared to, do it anyway.

3. if you feel like poop, surround yourself with stuff that makes you feel less like poop.

4. if you feel awesome, rub your awesomeness on someone that feels like poop.

5. get up and do it all over again tomorrow.


the end.

xx

grounded

trying my best
to stay grounded
but every day
it's work

hard work

but that is the way of life
and i am thankful
for all the teachers
in my life.