In my Facebook memories from a year ago, one of my blog posts popped up. A year ago today, we were settling into the unknowns after John's pulmonary emboli. We had so many questions about what our future would look like, and we were trying so hard to have faith and enjoy the days. We were looking forward to the November ahead---to Thanksgiving, to hockey games, family parties. I was awaiting the results of the second embryo transfer.
These are some of the words I wrote a year ago today:
"Today, I light a candle, and sit in ceremony, reflecting. I'll gather with friends for an Indian lunch. I'll go thrifting. I'll go to a parent-teacher conference. But through it all, I'll hold this feeling close---this unknowing, this beautiful jumping-off-the-edge feeling that starts it all."
It's wild to think how little has changed in a year. We're still in a holding pattern as far as the future in regards to John's job. We are still looking forward to all the same things, and filling our days with all the same things that we love. The only difference is that I grew and gave birth to a beautiful baby for an incredible couple!
There's been an insane amount of growth and learning that's happened during these 12 months. We've learned the ultimate lesson in patience. We've learned the hard way that things don't always go as planned. That life throws curveballs when you least expect it. But the bottom line remains the same--- we circle, we take care of each other, we check in. We have low moments, we check out, we're human. We rise up again, we wait, we rally. It's cyclical, and maddening, and full of bright moments.
