more weekend goodness-

johnnyboy at the maine diner...check out the chowdah-

looking for edible herbs in the back-alleys of portsmouth, nh...just like jamie oliver. "just give these a rinse in some water and the piss'll come right off!"

graffiti that looks very similar to my husband...

we found razzles on our search...but they just didn't taste like we remembered! so so gross...they made a big wad of brownpoop in our mouths.

johnny's first bite of his razzle...yuck!

we were so shocked to find razzles (after seeing a random show on the food network about them, we vowed to find them on our "vacation"...) we were even more shocked to find that the teenager working behind the counter could not count change back to us. john needed milk for a bad case of heartburn.

john examining old typewriters. he got a laugh out of the ad that read "portable!" he remarked on how funny it would be busting out the typewriter in borders cafe.
johnny surprised me with a new cd (a rare thing in our family) and some politically incorrect and scarily-white-and-toxic pumpkin seeds.

my yum hot chocolate-

the start of our trip-

(so excited about the prospects of another weekend coming up, that i thought i should post more pics from this past weekend-)

fun fun face

me as a guy
johnny west asian
johnny apeman
johnny el greco


john east asian


so i'm watching grace watch weebleville for the 1,000th time, trying to get through contractions and leg pain that i can't even explain in words, so i decided to have some fun with our faces, and here are the results. i think me as a man might just be the scariest/most hilarious thing i've ever seen, and i got quite a laugh out of eastasianjohnny, too.

anyway, i've been working on changing perspective/getting out of routines lately, and i'm finding it to be really enlightening. for example, we go to the library almost every day, but lately i've started parking in a completely different spot, which allows us to walk through a bit of forest and pick up acorns/pinecones-
and thinking outside the box as far as cooking (although we're probably having frozen pizza tonight)-
the whole fairyhouse thing has really helped, too...grace looks everywhere for things to add to her little hideouts for the fairies-

this website isn't something i'd usually visit but i have to admit it gave me quite a laugh, especially considering the tender place i hold in my heart for he-man (i used to watch him and the thundercats every day afterschool at my grammie vicki's house)-
he-man does the four non-blondes

plus, it helped me reclaim the song back from stupid ex

weekend crafty

femiknit
is a genius knitter and wonderful gift giver and friend
thank you thank you thank you for taking care of us this weekend
eating pastries and teaching my husband to knit
and thank you most of all for the gorgeous sweater and little cap that joey will wear home from the hospital
it is by far one of the most extravagant and fantastic gifts i've ever received! what a joy to have such crafty friends (em! i still stroke your quilt numerous times a day!)

i loved watching the littleones making a huge pile of fleece (all on their own, making up games and names when left up to their own devices)...speaking in their own language to each other...saying "jumpity jump!" over and over, and managing not to get hurt-

more details to come on the rest of the weekend, which was spent partly in the hospital (grace's dislocated elbow) and doctor's office (grace's urinary tract infection due to evil evil evil purple seasame street bubble bath). anyone that finds me a hypoallergenic bubbly (i mean real bubbles...grace has high expectations...) bubble bath that doesn't make beegines swell up gets the prize.

self portrait tuesday

taken on sunday during our "vacation"...more to come later, but in the meantime, let's just say that it was one of the best days i've had in a long time. love the moth-eaten-hole in john's sweater!

ehlp!

instead of writing "help!" like i intended for my title, it came out ehlp!, and i'm leaving it that way because it made me laugh-

anyway, i'm going to post more later about my amazing weekend/"vacation", but in the meantime, i need some book recommendations! i've read so much lately that i've run dry for any more ideas. even better, let me borrow some of your books! that would make me even happier. steph, why doesn't the methuen library carry any jodi picoult books? hello! i think i'm coming out of my science fiction binge (god, i'm a troll...) but it's hard to match the greatness of "into the forest". i'm reading "the bee season" right now and i'm absolutely hating it.

thanks peeps! more to come later!

i found my new favorite of favorites book-
"into the forest" by jean hegland

the question remains...what am i supposed to read now that i'm finished such an amazingly powerful book, one that actually made me cry? (i never cry when i read...)

oh no.

tonight

i want a fire in the yard without worrying about catching the neighborhood on fire-

"he felt a delight in wood and the touch of it, neither as forester nor as carpenter; it was the delight of the living tree itself." -JRR Tolkien

yes, i'm quoting a troll, but i love this quote.

'i'm sad, mommy. i hurt my feelings." -grace, just now.

cry for help

i can't stop eating chocolate, sweets, breads, anything called "food." please help. i really just can't stop, no matter how much i read up on the benefits of eating healthy, wonderful, organic food...i absolutely have no resisting power when it comes to halloween candy, m&m's, tripoli's pizza, and fresh loaves (i'm not kidding when i say loaves) of bread from the market.

can it just be because i'm pregnant?

also, for all those concerned/interested, i had a fabulous day today, thanks to my dad and grace...spent 2nd-hand shopping for pants for the little ones (4 pairs!), walking along the water in newburyport, antiquing, watching grace ride her bike, feeding ducks, eating (of course, hello!), and just chatting. all the things i love. it's almost 4p and grace is still napping...i may have officially snapped out of it.

now off for another dip into the m&m's bag!

xo

donkeyballs

dear mama that brought your sick, donkey-coughing, little double-ear-infectionned cherub to the library yesterday,

why? why oh why would you do such a thing? not only did i feel bad for her, but last night at 2am when i was awake and sweating and cold and sick in bed, i felt really, really bad for myself.

hope i don't run into you again.

xo

bring in the funk

(i'm going to randomly post pictures of recent crafting adventures in hopes that i will feel more productive and super crafty despite my funk of a mood-)

i have this tendency to get all weirdly hormonal sometimes and really have to work at it to pull myself out of a funk. needless to say, i've been struggling a bit, working on making the days interesting enough so i don't pull my hair out with boredom and frustration. because i truly feel blessed to be able to stay home and mother grace, to be able to eat what i want, wear what i want, go to the library seven times a week and hang out by the fire during the middle of the day making fairyhouses. i need to stay grounded and healthy, especially now with this little one growing inside. i'm just feeling angsty...and "not enough". not crafty enough and not doing enough. not eating healthy enough and not doing as much as i should. not calling people back and not emailing people promptly enough. sometimes i just get so overwhelmed by the little details. make a whole quilt in a day? sure! knit a scarf or two for christmas gifts? no problem! call the electric company? the deal's off.


what is wrong with me? does anyone else feel so overwhelmed by such nothingness? i need to do something wonderful, have an adventure. john's got something in the works for the weekend, so i'm trying to focus my energies on staying upbeat until then. in the meantime, i've got storytime for 2's (which i love observing...grace trying to battle shyness and boldness at the same time) and doula class tonight.

oh pregnant belly! making it harder and harder to size my aprons...

self portrait tuesday

birthday cigar mirror

today

this is what i feel like today. enough said.

thank you to c.s. lewis and augusten burroughs for making me feel a little better.

fallish

my new favorite pastime is giving gracie my digital camera and letting her do her work. it takes up hours, and she never gets bored. it always ends in her crying when it's time to take the camera away. i love this close-up shot she took the other day of a plastic pumpkin.

this weekend has been spent scurrying, hurrying, and building fairy houses. hot chocolate and whipped cream and sweaters. spinach pie and knitting. getting ready for the twins' christening today. large fruit salad won't fit in the fridge...wondering what to do with it. off to shower.

xo

halleluia, or however you spell it-

this is the image i was left with after putting the camera over the bathroom stall in the basement of the church that em and i went to go see kevin sing at- i missed em in this shot, but not in the next :) she'll be lucky if i don't post it.

can i just say how happy i am to be done my test? very overwhelming, tunnel-vision and sweatin'-to-the-oldies inducing, but done. i'm done! if i fail, i will officially be the only person in hesser college history to have failed the NH state test. so that's an achievement in itself. i'm freakin' done. my dad rocks, papa jean-yo's (how grace pronounces papa gino's), and nana all rock. pregnancy wool pants and the fall rock. grace's new little man pants rock. and can i just state for the record that i love my library? all my librarian trolls, esp. miss kathy and miss meagan, rock. grace had her first day of storytime for 2's yesterday (big girl!) and she was awesome. i try to be unbiased but it's quite clear that grace is the favorite amongst the librarians. they have a really hard time hiding it. and i'm ok with that.

off to diddle. xo!

grace

anyone out there reading this...can you send me a little grace tomorrow for my NH state licensing massage exam? it's a practical exam, with two observers, and to anyone who knows me, i don't do well under pressure, and especially not while being observed. right now i feel pretty at peace with the whole thing, but who knows what will happen on my hour ride up there. i cannot wait until 12:15p tomorrow, cannot wait for the weekend, cannot wait to go shopping for joey yarn for my scarf that i will wear to the hospital.

did i mention that i have wonderful friends who take care of me and love me and shower me with love and attention despite my pregnancy craziness? thank you renee for donating yourself to my cause, to boo for coming yesterday, and for em for the wonderful weekend. i look forward to the next time we can almost catch my neighborhood on fire.

xo

trollspotting

i still feel like i can't write about the weekend...full, wonderful, overwhelming, tiring. but i couldn't help but post these trollspotting pictures of em for boo. taken at the davis square salvation army...em is sorting through, ranking, and organizing stuffed animals, trying to decide which ones seem most "life-like". to give her some credit, she is a teacher, and these were purchased for her class :)

self portrait tuesday

me, my babygirl, lavender, pottery, basket, final harvest. xo

updates of the weekend and crafting to come, if i can get into gear this week.

early

goodbye diapers...we here at the gilbert household are now sporting the nature-maker, shake-what-your-mama-gave-you look for all waking hours of the day! grace's bum looks pimply and rough from running over every wooden surface in our house (remember that next time you eat over and consider eating something off the table or floor!) but we're making progress. thanks to boo, we have a nice up-close picture of the big dookie grace took in her potty yesterday...i just haven't gotten a chance to upload it yet.

thank you boo for your visit yesterday. i had fun having a pregnant breakdown and almost getting bangs with you. i have to say that i was relieved to find no-bangs this morning, but i was still left with the feeling that i'm destined to look cooler than i do, and still need to find a way to make that happen.

i was up at 5am this morning because i'm so excited about-
-the weather
-my emily coming this weekend for the baby festivities
-the circle that boo mowed in my overgrown lawn so we can burn lavender and mint and roast marshmallows in my firepit tonight
-chicken soup
-library booksale!
-grace waking up
-steph picking me up
-going to diesel later
-having a suspected craft-filled day with my favorite people
-seeing john's feet peek out from under the covers
-shiitake mushrooms for breakfast tomorrow, and cinnamon buns!

i need to go jump in the shower...i have too much energy for it only being 7am. i'm going to crash and burn tonight.

thank you john for date night, fisherman's ale, and wings! xo have a good day with the missers.

grace and twine, and a bit of virginia

"For now she need not think about anybody.
She could be herself. And that was what now, she often
felt the need of--to think; well not even to think.
To be silent; to be alone. All the being and the doing,
expansive, glittering, vocal, evaporated...
Although she continued to knit, and sat upright, it was
thus that she felt herself; and this self having
shed its attachments was free for the strangest adventures."

from To the Lighthouse, Virginia Woolf, 1927

grace makes me laugh-

as i sit down at the computer this morning,

grace, who sits on the bed behind me, informs me-

"mumma, i need attention."

needless to say, it's the end of my computer time.

self portrait tuesday-

these pics were taken this weekend at steph's wedding...i love how they are all glowy and surreal. the one on the right is probably the scariest picture i've ever taken of myself, gorging on caramel-filled chocolates, mid-chew. the wedding was awesome, and boo took care of me all sunday AND yesterday, with coffee and farm-trips and dinner. thank you so much. xo

last night

last night was a fun success....i didn't go into labor, grace was so good i was bursting with pride and happiness, and i finally got to give steph her secret wedding scrapbook! overall a great night. i was happy that i had spent the whole week loafing around not walking or lifting too much, because by the end of the night, joey was pushing down hard and trying to make his debut. john got toasty, there was lots of inappropriate laughing, and we watched a movie made by steph's soon-to-be sister-in-law tara that brought tears to my eyes. loved the jewel-gifts, melissa! i'm going to have to try and resist today and not wear mine. thanks for all your hard work.

and boo, i never really thanked you officially, but thank you so much for taking care of me on sunday, when all i wanted to do was sit around on my bum and read the paper and stupid magazines...and you cooked me and my whole troupe both breakfast and a gourmet dinner...(parts of which can be seen above-) thank you, thank you. and thanks in advance for spending your day off today with my wee one so i can go get a pedicure and eat your favorite seafood without you! you are truly a best of besties.

xo

gearing up-

here's a little snuggle/booger shot to cheer everyone's day!

gearing up for auntie stephie's wedding...which means that the begining part of this week has been spent crafting, reading, visiting, relaxing, and not doing much lifting (laundry and grace) or going out anywhere (which would require lifting grace in and out of her carseat). i'm trying to save my poor little uterine ligaments. tonight the festivities begin with the rehearsal dinner and practice, and then various other girly activities until it all culminates in the wedding late saturday afternoon! i'm very excited, to have some QT with my family and friends and to see steph into her new phase of life. i want her to be happy and satisfied, relaxed and confident! the weather may not be the greatest, but we will all certainly have our fill of fun and wine (yes, i'm having one small little glass tonight, and one on saturday, which would qualify as "my fill). and i'm very excited about seeing grace be part of something so big and magical as her godmama's wedding day! her little slippers are the cutest things ever invented. if only i could stop worrying about our frizzy hair...

tiny timmy

my tiniest of timmers has taken a liking to hiding in small spaces...seen here hiding in her daddy's stinky gym bag. even though my house is small, i'm afraid i'm going to really lose her one day! oh the things she finds in the bottom of my closet.

in other news, grace is a big girl now...and sleeps in her own big girl's bed! thank you crystal and collin for the encouragement...leading by example! so far we've had no problems (four nights-) knock on wood!

xo

self portrait tuesday

modeling the secret christmas present scarf for my mom- don't tell!

thank you

a big thank you to philip pullman, genius, master storyteller, for filling up my life with such wonderment these past few months that i've been reading 'the golden compass,' 'the subtle knife', and finally 'the amber spyglass.' the last book will certainly be listed amongst my favorites for years to come. i just finished it and feel relieved and saddened all at once, like a part of my life is over.

two quotes from the book:

"will considered what to do. when you choose one way out of many, all the ways you don't take are snuffed out like candles, as if they'd never existed. at the moment all will's choices existed at once. but to keep them all in existence meant doing nothing. he had to choose, after all."

and

"she flung a mental lifeline to that physical self, and tried to recall the feeling of being in it: all the sensations that made up being alive. the exact touch of her friend atal's soft-tipped trunk caressing her neck. the taste of bacon and eggs. the triumphant strain in her muscles as she pulled herself up a rock face. the delicate dancing of her fingers on a computer keyboard. the smell of roasting coffee. the warmth of her bed on a winter night.

and gradually she stopped moving; the lifeline held fast, and she felt the weight and strength of the current pushing against her as she hung there in the sky.

and then a strange thing happened. little by little (as she reinforced those sense-memories, adding others, tasting an iced margarita in california, sitting under the lemon trees outside a restaurant in lisbon, scraping the frost off the windshield of her car), she felt the dust wind easing. the pressure was lessening."

beautiful, breath-taking, thank you.

in other news, joey is doing well. spent the morning at the doctor's. ultrasound #2. had deep conversation with ultrasound tech. that brought tears to my eyes. how lucky am i to have a healthy, happy, 2lb. 1oz. little baby boy swimming inside me?

xo

love, love, love-

sending happy love to everyone-
em, good luck on your first day of school,
boo, we miss you...hope you had a good audition last night and your cooloo feels better,
crystal, hope you're feeling better...let us know if there's anything that we can do,
steph, no stressies this week! go buy yourself a drink treat and put your feet up!

xo

gracie bouquet in the bathroom

trying to remember some sweet grace moments, like this bouquet of clover she picked for me last week, as she is currently peeing over every square inch of my house while i try to potty train her.

feeling much better this week--i can actually walk without feeling like joey is going to fall out. also have much more energy...working on lots of craft projects (just finished a huge, many-month long project for a dear, dear friend)-

there's a huge crock of chili cooking downstairs, and for anyone that knows me, this puts me in a very very good mood. wishing it was more fallish and i wasn't sweating like a pregnant pig.

xo

self portrait tuesday

taken at church during my friend's rehearsal...my growing legs and red velvet pants-
sexy sexy!

scary wonder

an amazing illustration from my girl gyo fujikawa, from a book "oh, what a busy day!"

there's so much horror and horribleness on the news, i thought i'd post a picture of children playing peacefully amongst beasts, finding comfort and solace from friends. grace is sleeping peacefully now, too, and i keep peeking in at her, looking at her in disbelief and wonder. sometimes, despite all the craziness and scariness in the world, i can find comfort in the little things...

grace pulling at my ears and saying "lobies, lobies, lobies"-
phone calls from joey just to check up-
leftover beef stew-
filling up gas grill tanks with dad as a lame excuse to hang out-
endless tomatoes from the garden, eaten warm with salt, pepper, and vinegar-

xo

puppa's birthday photobooth

why did it post 4 times, you ask? because grace is playing jumprope with my mouse while slamming on the keyboard.

hugs, more thank you's, and science fiction

grace and collin last week at the CGS park...they both look so sweet- but immediately after, grace was pushing collin down and being a complete nightmare, and had to go into time out over and over again.


thank you boo for making me cookies last night and eating my beef stew even though it was 100 degrees outside and you were sweating profusely, and putting up with my crazy, no-boundries family and watching me weed through contractions and anger and also for coming to our library and meeting our librarian and playing with glass shapes, and taking out a knife in the elevator and letting me scold you.

thank you crystal for this gorgeous photo, and allowing me to wake up with smiles from my favorite little ones-

emily, i wish i could come this weekend, i want to come this weekend, but not only am i scared of physically being in the car that long (comfortability-speaking), but every time i think of how it would logistically work out i get nervous-

i have so many creative projects going...homemade gifts for everyone! all i want to do is go to thrift stores and antique fairs. but i'm slowly realizing that without backup to wrassle grace away from precious glass antique pieces, the adventures never quite work out to be quite as fun as i imagine them.

let me just state for the record that little baby joey is turning out to be a complete trollbaby...only allowing me to read science fiction. just finished "inkheart" by cornelia funke, and it was an epic story that wrecked my life, made me wish for more, gave me the worst nightmares- and last night, when i finally finished, i had the best, most peaceful sleep of my life. what shall i read now?

xo